Kindness isn't Free, and That's Okay

Via Pinterest

So I saw an image on Pinterest earlier. All it said was "Kind words cost nothing". It's a common sentiment. I've heard its like a million times. You probably have too. If your upbringing was anything like mine, you were taught that kindness was good and that you should always be kind.

But here's the thing: kind words can cost a lot.  They take energy. They take effort. They take more mental space than I like to admit. It is so much easier for me to say the sarcastic thing that immediately pops into my head. It's so much easier for me to do the bare minimum all the time.

Kind words are hard. Kindness isn't natural. Most days, I don't want to put the effort in. Most days, I want to be mean to everyone, including myself. And I'm learning that it's okay for that to be true.

Somedays, I fail to be kind. That's human nature. A lot of the time, I'm trying my best and coming up short. and that's okay too.

But you know what the hardest thing for me to learn has been? That sometimes I have to unkind to someone else to be kind to myself. Maybe I refuse a hug that I can't handle at the moment. Maybe I avoid someone I don't feel comfortable around. That's kindness too, kindness to myself.

Society tells us to be kind, and we should be. Society says to be polite, and we should be. But it becomes so much easier when we acknowledge that it does cost something. It becomes easier when we acknowledge that we sometimes have to choose kindness to one person over kindness to another. It becomes easier when we acknowledge that we need kindness too.

So no. Kindness isn't free, and that's ok.